Mixed emotions

Today I have mixed emotions! I have joy because Christmas is sure a day of joy! I have sadness because I am not with my kids today. My heart is heavy as tears run down my face. 

I also sit hear and wonder what more I can be doing for God. My hearts desire is to do more but my health keeps me from doing what I really want to do, preach and teach. I sometimes wonder if I am reaching anyone with my podcast. But God knows my heart desires.